When bodies break
When minds unravel
When courage fades
When darkness covers
When ‘why?’ is whispered in the dark
When loneliness suffocates
When weakness wins
When Your presence is not felt
Then souls get stronger
And questions are answered, in a different way than ever imagined
How did I not see before
That when everything is lost
My soul remains
Maybe that is why healing isn’t given to our bodies
Maybe God cares more about healing our souls than our bodies
After all, my soul is going to live forever, my body is not.
So when my health fails me
My soul is immune
When I am all alone, going through
unimaginable pain alone, begging for
Jesus to show
He never left my soul
When I cry out why
until my voice is hoarse
My soul holds the answers
When I am grieving the loss
of my health, again
My soul receives comfort
When my whole world is crashing
around me
My soul looks up and fixes it’s gaze upon the cross
When my body is broken
Only then can my soul heal
When my body is temporary
My soul is eternal
So until the day that my body is left behind me, and my soul is home
When I feel my thoughts and the reality of my life hitting me in the face like a wave in a storm
My soul will walk on the water for me and I will not sink
So let the storm rage on
Because I will praise my God that he realized for me
That my soul is the most important thing that I have.
And that he loves me enough to let me suffer so that I will not suffer an eternity apart from him.
He is making me beautiful, and for the first time, I realize what that actually means
I was told that the enemy knows what is going to hurt us most and that is what he uses against us. But that God lets it happen because he cares more about our souls than our bodies. Which honestly, made me kind of mad at first. But then when I took a closer look at my life, I realized how true that was. For me, the enemy knew that my health was my downfall, so I have daily pain. But I realized that every time my health was tested and my body broke further than it had broken before, my soul had grown stronger than before. And then I thought how cool it is that we have a God that knows the limitations of this life, and the reality of the enemy in our world, and so He chooses to care more about healing our soul than our minds or bodies or hearts. Every time that I felt alone or couldn’t feel Gods presence, he sent the holy spirit to invade our souls. I don’t think that’s a coincidence. The holy spirit is in our souls, not walking around Earth with us- which is totally possible for the creator of the universe to do, if that was what he actually wanted. Our souls go to heaven, not our bodies. He realizes that we live in a fallen world, and I know that must break His heart, but he chooses to save our souls instead. So maybe, next time you are asking God why or God to bring healing in to your lives, and it seems like he’s not answering, maybe look closer. Maybe He is answering all of your prayers, but chooses to answer them in a way that helps your soul and not a way that you can see at first glance. But look closer and ask yourself what matters most to God.
As for me, all I can do is pray, Thy Will Be Done and fix my eyes upon Jesus and the cross- when I do that, all of my pain and suffering and my life seems to pale in comparison.
Matthew 14:22-32
Mark 14:36